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We got married a couple years ago and got Family Visits.
At that point he had been in for 13 years and had not had sex with a woman for 13 years. He was very nervous prior to the visit, afraid he would not know what to do and what if he could not "perform". As soon as we were together in that apartment, everything felt completely natural and we had wonderful sex. Doing so will only make him feel more self conscious and make the matter worse.
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and crazy so I can't really get into details of how we met and such but he has been locked up for 9 years, I've been dating him for 4 months.
The first time was in a small uncomfortable car and he kept getting leg cramps and stopping so we gave up. The second time i didn't bring a condom which stopped him, I brushed that off, but this last time he kept going soft We have plenty of oral sex and he uses his fingers greatly but ....fact he kept going soft has me thinking... He actually apologized to me later that night, like, "I'm sorry I couldn't perform tonight I will next time." I'm wondering how does he know he will next time? I see you posted he was in the hole just a few weeks ago.
Make sure before you engage in sexual behaviors that lead to intercourse, that you have privacy and a setting where he can relax and really be himself.As time goes by he will relax and not need the above so much to be able to perform.Let me give you an example: A couple got caught last year having sex in a storage room during week-end visitation. Especially when the guy had his pants around his ankles LOL then got hauled out of the visiting room in handcuffs, in front of everyone there.Under current circumstances I can only see him once in a while, I know he is not with another female in the meantime but we are having a problem with sex? We have just recently tried having sex so I mean this is not a big issue that has been on going.Its just that last night it got me thinking ..haven't we had sex? He constantly calls me beautiful,gorgeous, sexy, etc. Or do men really have a problem having sex after being in prison?